To Pee Or Not To Pee

Photo credit: kconnors from morguefile.com

I’m all for saving the environment, but is that extra ounce of liquid in my bladder really going to make that much difference? Apparently All Nippon Airways thinks so. http://www.mnn.com/transportation/planes-trains-bikes/stories/pee-before-you-fly-policy-reduces-carbon-emissions They are actually going to have ‘loo attendants’ standing by the gate to ask if you have to go one more time before you get on the plane. The theory is that since passengers will weigh less, there will be less carbon emissions. My mom used to do the same thing on our family car trips to Florida, albeit for a different reason.

My dad had an ironclad rule about stopping. It had to be for food, gas or sleep, or some combo of the three. Bathroom breaks were to be taken care of during those times and no other. Well, sorry, but when I was 4 or 5, my bladder was the size of a pea, so at some point during the journey Dad would slam on the brakes, whip the car over to the side of I-65 and then throw open the passenger doors so I could squat in between and pee all over the back of my socks. And if Mom wasn’t always talking about going to the bathroom, I probably wouldn’t have even thought about it.

It was the same way the one time I went deep-sea fishing. The captain showed us all the bucket that we’d have to use if we couldn’t make it the full four hours and before he even finished his speech, I was already preparing for the time when I would have to attempt hovering over a large white pail in rough seas. And I actually got to practice this skill more than once. Okay, maybe I wouldn't have had to go quite so often if I'd spent more time holding a fishing pole and less time holding a beer but still, he'd already put the suggestion in my mind. That's why I'm hoping that other airlines don't follow their lead. If you ask me that kind of question before I get on the plane, I'll be squirming in my seat before the safety instructions even start.